IN MY OPINION people are people and it's just human nature that makes us hurt one another.
If you ask anyone who knows, spousal abuse is about exploitation and control in an unequal power dynamic. So if you're a man who will stay at home taking care of your children, you will eventually be at the same disadvantage... just like women who do the same.
Remember, women in the home are abused at a rate that is statistically much higher than their sisters in the workplace. This will be your risk too.
An expert in the field once told me that (absent violence) if you have two people abusing one another than you just have a couple of jerks abusing one another... No harm, no foul.
HOWEVER, if one person can't fight back because of a disadvantage or disability, or a lack of power because only one of them controls the money. Or if one has a career while the other's been in the home taking care of children and has no means of support? THAN YOU HAVE SPOUSAL ABUSE.
Or at least that's been the definition... if you were a woman.
It really shouldn't matter if you're a man or a woman. Abuse in the home is about control and exploitation, not as much about how.
As an abuse victim myself I've sat in with a group of abused women telling my story and had them tell me what I went through was exactly like what they went through. IT'S ABOUT CONTROL and being made to feel powerless & trapped while even feeling like it was your fault that you're being abused.
It may sound perverse to anyone who's never been abused, but it's a very real thing in human nature.
And don't make the mistake of thinking that because you're a real he man or because you're physically stronger than your wife or because you KNOW SHE LOVES YOU or that you think she would never do something like that.... Because IT CAN happen to you if you don't take precautions against it throughout your marriage; It can happen to anyone under the right circumstances.
In the end I hope you'll be able to raise your children with a little bit of a man's perspective on the world the way I hope I was able to do. Take them fishing, take them hunting.... Take them to a show.... Whatever, Just try to show them what integrity is from a good & committed Man's perspective. I say this because I personally think it's something that's been missing in our young men & women for a long time.
My kids are mostly all grown up now and most people think they (all four) turned out very well.... despite everything.
YOU JUST NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GETTING YOUR SELF INTO!
